Lessons from the Pool

At the pool today, I watched my friend’s son run around, completely carefree. As he was running, he spotted a discarded watering can and quickly picked it up and started playing with it. Within minutes, seconds really, a mom came over and took the watering can out of his hands and promptly gave it back to her daughter who had been, quite contently, playing with a different toy.

Though my friend’s son didn’t seem to mind, I started to fume a little. “Is this really the world we live in that instead of teaching selflessness, we’re teaching our children selfishness?” I thought. “Even had the little girl shed a few tears, what a great time to teach her that we share what we have.”  I stood there for a bit being pretty judgmental, thinking about what a brat the little girl would probably end up being since she obviously was handed everything.

A few hours later, as I played the scene over in my head, the Lord gently reminded me of the plank I have in my own eye (Matthew 7:3-5) “What things are you holding onto? Where are you selfish?” I felt him asking me. A list instantly came to mind:

My house. I have a small, but happy, home that I could easily invite people into. Yet, rarely do we have friends over. I use the excuse that I’m and extrovert and enjoy “getting out,” but my guess is that others enjoy getting out too.

My money. Sure, we tithe, but could I be giving more? Do I really need another dress, even though it was on clearance? Do I need to get coffee out when I have a perfectly good coffee maker at home?

My time. This is the biggest one. How often do I choose selfish ways to spend my time (TV, anyone?) instead of caring for my family or loving on my neighbors? I use the excuse “Well, I do so much during the day, I deserve a little rest in the evening.” While rest is good and important, do I really need 3 hours of down time?

Quietly, the Lord whispered to my heart, “How many times have you taken something from my hands to use your own way?”  Here I was, judging a woman I’d never even met, when in reality, I am a perfect example of how to live a selfish life. I expect things from my own children (you better share that truck!) and random women at the pool, that I’m not even willing to do. Instead of just demanding selflessness, maybe I need to start actually living it. What better way to teach my children selflessness than to act it out daily.

Lord, teach me to be selfless. Teach me to hold nothing back and to give everything I have. Let me go to bed tired every night because I have served you by serving others. Let me be the hands and feet of Jesus. Amen.

Adventures in Love (part 2)

As we got to Pizza Hut it looked closed, so we pulled into the parking lot to turn around. There was a car stopped in an odd spot and John was focused on trying not to hit it. I, however, looked over and saw a man checking the tire. I also saw a woman and two kids. “Stop, John. Help them. There are kids with them.” My husband, being that kind of guy, instantly stopped and got out to check on the people. I followed closely behind and found out that their axel had just broken.  Over the next three hours we were able to help them get their car towed and get home.

If the story stopped there, it would be something nice that we did. But what actually happened is amazing and it was what God did.

As I transported the kids and their mom, Maria, to their home, John shared his story (testimony) with the man, Carlo.  Then, he shared a tract. Carlo looked at John and said, “I don’t think it was an accident that you guys stopped tonight. I want to do this.” John was able to pray with Carlo right there for him to accept Christ as his Savior!

John got Carlo’s phone number, and though they couldn’t attend church with us that week, they want to go next time we come to town. Maria and I also have plans to get our kiddos together for a play date.

In Matthew 9:35-38 we read:

Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness.  When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.”

I love my husband, but he isn’t special. He just listened to the Lord and did what he was called to.

One of my favorite songs is “I will Follow” by Chris Tomlin. The chorus says:

Where you go, I'll go
Where you stay, I'll stay
When you move, I'll move
I will follow you

Who you love, I'll love
How you serve, I'll serve
If this life I lose, I will follow you
I will follow you

As followers of Christ, this needs to be the cry of our hearts. More than anything else, who He loves, we need to love. Joanna Weaver says that we should be like Jesus and minister to (love) others on our way, out of our way, and in all kinds of ways (Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World, pg 88). There are people who have needs around every corner. Some needs are easy to spot; other needs aren't so obvious. But if we love God, then we have to love others. And if we love others, we have to be willing to let God use us in their lives. The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.

Love God. Love others. Love the hell out of them.

Adventures in Love (part 1)

Nine years and one month ago, nearly to the day, I started dating my husband. Most couples fall in love over coffee or dinner—we fell in love over a homeless man. John and I were on a mission trip together, and though we’d never met before, we bonded quickly. On one of the last nights, we were in Hollywood. As we walked up and down the street, we saw a homeless man. Even though we were “off” that night, we stopped, asked his name (Charlie) and asked if we could buy him dinner. A different couple was bringing back dinner for him, but we were able to chat for a bit. When the other couple (strangers to us) came back, the five of us prayed together. Oh, and did I mention this was all in the shadow of a three story version of the Oscar statue, since award season was just around the corner?

You’d think that if that’s how we fell in love, the last nine years would be filled with amazing times of sharing Christ’s love with others and making disciples of men. There are a few stories, but most are from our first months of dating. The last nine years have been mostly spent selfishly, to be honest. Don’t get me wrong, we love the Lord and have grown in Him in many ways, but we haven’t shown His love to those around us in the ways we should have been.

Three years ago, my husband started at Trinity EvangelicalDivinity School. This past semester, he had an amazing class on evangelism taught by Lon Anderson. I watched my husband’s life change. The heart he’s always had for evangelism bloomed. He even shared Christ with one of my family members…something I’ve never done in my 25 years of following Jesus. Meanwhile, last year, I read Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver. Because of her book, I gave my fears up and asked God to help me love Him with all of me. Then, three months ago I read Crazy Love by Francis Chan. It just confirmed everything I’d been feeling: all I want is God. After years and years of spiritual milk, I just want spiritual meat.

Now, fast forward to Friday night, April, 27^th. We dropped our kids off with my in-laws and went to Wheaton Bible Church to hear Francis Chan and Rend Collective Experiment.  There are no words to explain what the Lord did in both of us that night. The song “Build Your Kingdom” started the burning in our hearts and was followed by an amazing message by Mr. Chan. In short, he said to go out on a limb, do crazy things for Jesus, and see what happens. Jump!—He’ll catch you. And maybe, if you’re lucky, the ground will shake. J

As we left, John and I were exhausted, but excited and pumped up. As we started making plans on how we’d love the lost, I looked at him and said, “This is how we fell in love. Why on earth have we wasted the last nine years?” I also said, “I’m starving! Can we please get some food?” With a grin that said, “Lets share Jesus with our waitress,” John actually said, “Let’s go to Pizza Hut for bread sticks.”

Sabbatical: Over

That's all. The sabbatical that I've been on for the past few (many?) months is over.

Adventures in MOPS

As I walked into the church lobby, I started to sweat. It wasn’t because it was warm out (goodness knows January in Chicago isn’t warm) and it was only partially because I was carrying two babies in their carrier car seats. Mostly, the sweat came from pure, unadulterated nervousness.

After living in our Chicago suburb for six months, three which had been spent caring for our newborn sons, I hardly knew anyone and had no real friends. I was tired, bored, and lonely. Though John had agreed to move back to Wisconsin in a few months, I knew I had to make friends, or at least meet people, if I was going to stay sane. I decided to try out MOPS, since at the very least, I knew I’d get a break from my kiddos.

I didn’t meet my new BFF that year but I did make enough friends that we changed our plans and stayed in the area. The next year, I made a few more friends, this time creating deeper bonds. By the third year of MOPS, I was leading the group and had made deep, life-long, life-changing friendships.

That’s why I love MOPS. Sure, the break from our kids is nice. So are the breakfasts and speakers. But we can find all of those things at a play group or a story time. The difference with MOPS is that we come together, as sisters, living life together. Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12 says “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Sisters, we are going to fall down and there are going to be days when we feel cold and overpowered. My prayer for each of you is that you find someone to walk with you—someone to come along and help you when times get though, and someone that you can help out too. God’s plan was never for us to walk alone. If you haven't found a MOPS group, do (mops.org). It honestly could change your life. Start walking with someone today. No mom left behind!

Adventures in Rhino Hunting

Okay, so I’m not really going big game hunting, though it would probably be easier than getting the boys to sleep.

A few months ago, George started waking up sobbing. When I’d ask him what was wrong, he’d tell me that he was scared of the rhino in his room. Patrick jumped on the bandwagon and started to tell me about hippos in their room (though he never woke up scared, so I think he was just trying to get some attention). Needless to say, our nights began to get a bit “zoo-y.”  

Over the past few months, we’ve tried everything to rid ourselves of these pesky rhinos. We’ve prayed, we’ve sprayed “Rhino Repellent,” we’ve yelled “Go back to the zoo, rhino!” For a short while, the rhino seemed to have gone away. However, the last two nights, our rhino infestation has begun again.

Here’s where I have a problem: there’s a fine line between genuine fear and nearly-three-year-old manipulation. How can I be a sensitive, supportive mom without becoming a pushover when it comes to bed time? I think this is one of those times I need to trust my MomSense and go with my gut: I think my boy is scared and needs extra love right now.

So far, we’ve got nothing that is consistently working. Each night we tackle our rhino issues in a different way. Last night, George slept with my pillow and I slept with his. Tonight, we sprayed a room spray and called it “keep away rhino spray.” Tomorrow night, who knows?

But there is one thing I do know. This time of “rhino hunting” will not be in vain. If nothing else, I want my boys to know that no matter when they’re scared and no matter what they’re scared of, they can always call on Jesus.

One of my closest friends shared the following verse with me as we’ve been going through this:

In peace, I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.  Psalm 4:8

I pray that long after the rhinos have left, my boys will remember they are safe in the Lord.

Adventures in Potty Training

The subtitle to this could easily be "A Surefire Way to Make Mama Crabby and Want a Glass of Wine (which we happen to be out of)."


I try to be very careful about comparing life with twins to life with a singleton, mostly because I have no clue what life with one child is like. In fact, this is only the second time that I (publicly will comment on the difficulty of having twins in comparison to having one. But as you read, somehow I doubt any parent of singleton children (even those parents with "almost twins") are going to argue with me on this one.


Potty training twin is horrible. It slowly sucks every ounce of patience and life out of a person. I think this last week has shortened my life by at least a month or two.


We’ve been thinking about potty training for a while, and I finally decided that the boys were ready, and so was I. I was ready for messes. I was ready for laundry. I was ready for endless "potty talk" (thank you Elmo Goes Potty for teaching my boys the word "dookie"). I was even ready for giving up nearly all of my self-respect by making up silly little cheers for each bathroom success.


However, I was not ready for losing all control of my house. The chaos is wearing me down.


Here's how our day used to go, in relation to bodily functions:

George has a dirty diaper. I'm drinking my coffee. George waits a little bit, then, when I'm ready, I change the diaper. Two hours later, Patrick needs a diaper change. Again, I change him, but not until I’m ready to. We leave for Target. Two more dirty diapers that can wait until we get home. Another change before bed and that's that.

Here's what life looks like now:


George says, "Mommy! I have to pee-pee." I put down my coffee so quickly that some sloshes over the top of the cup. Mental note: clean that up later. I open the gate on the living room and let him go to the potty, because of course, both boys refuse to use the froggy potty we have available in the living room. George runs to the bathroom, strips naked, and climbs up onto the potty, where he quickly does his business. Then he has to use two squares of toilet paper (after I tell him to use one), puts them into the toilet without actually using them, flushes, and puts his face nearly into the bowl while yelling "bye-bye pee-pee and wipe." Then, he washes his hands, getting water everywhere, and I re-dress him. Meanwhile, Patrick is running all over the house because I didn’t close the gate behind us.


An hour later, both boys have to go potty. Patrick gets there first, strips naked, and sits on the potty (while reading a book) for about ten minutes. Meanwhile George, who again is naked, stands waiting for his turn. Patrick eventually goes, but George barely sits on the seat before he is going. Flush, say bye-bye, wash hands, dress both boys, and try to explain why we don't need to brush our teeth just because we see the toothpaste by the sink. Both boys take a quick run through the house, knock a few things over, and we head back to the living room.


Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.


I decide that we need to get out of the house. We get in the car and just start to drive when Patrick says he has to go potty. We find a public restroom to use where I won't feel too guilty for not buying anything. He sits for about five minutes. Nothing comes out. I re-dress him and help naked George go. Two seconds of tinkle. I re-dress him. Everyone washes their hands, while I continuously say, “don’t touch anything. Stop, no, no, seriously, don’t touch anything.” We get back to the car, buckle up, and re-start on our way. Patrick says he has to go potty. I then realize that what I thought was "go potty" is actually "go party." The boy wants to go to a party. We stopped for nothing. I weep internally about the headache I just caused myself.



A sweet lady at church said to me, "Oh, in twelve years, you'll miss not having to remind them that they have to go potty." Somehow I really doubt that.

Marshmallow Grabber

I am a marshmallow grabber. Some of you are probably wondering, “What on earth is a marshmallow grabber?” Without going into too much detail, in 1972 there was a psychologist at Stanford University who did a study on delayed gratification.  He took kids into a room and gave them a marshmallow. He told them that they could either eat it, or wait. If they waited, they’d be given a second marshmallow and they could eat both of them. If they were a “marshmallow grabber” (m.g.) they’d only have the one. (Check out this video of a more recent marshmallow experiment: http://youtu.be/6EjJsPylEOY)

I’m an m.g.  I would totally end up eating that first marshmallow if it took too long to bring my second one.  Because of that, pregnancy was a nightmare. I had to wait 9 whole months to see if we were having boys or girls (can you tell that my husband is a marshmallow waiter—he was the one behind the whole “let’s wait to find out the gender” thing). Being pregnant with twins, I fully expected them to be at least a little early. Finally, at 38 weeks my doctor had to induce. Apparently the twins are marshmallow waiters too.

Recently, my m.g.-ness has been acting up again. As a freelance writer, waiting is the name of the game. For those of you who aren’t familiar with freelancing, here’s the process (or least the process I’ve experienced):

You spend hours (days) working on a piece. You send it off to an editor. Then, you wait. And wait. And wait. Most places say they’ll get back to you in 8-12 weeks. That’s 2-3 months. And that’s if they get back to you on time. So, the 8-12 weeks go by and you still wait. Then, when you finally do hear back, it may or may not be good news.

Can you see how a lack of self-control is a bad thing when it comes to freelancing? I find myself wishing that I’d just get bad news instead of waiting for the potentially good news.  I supposed that’s not totally true, because if I knew that in thirteen weeks I was going to find out I was being published, I’d probably be willing to wait. But not knowing, having no closure on all the things I’ve sent out…it’s darn near maddening.

So here I sit, at the computer, trying not to check my email for the thirtieth time today, waiting. And praying. I’m praying that I’ll get better at being a marshmallow waiter and that I’ll stop going crazy over things I just can’t control.

"What'chu talkin' 'bout, Willis?": The Communications Between a Husband and Wife

“Baby, I’m cold,”  I called to John, who was in the living room. “Could you turn down the air conditioning?”

“Sure thing, hun.”

Ten minutes later, when I got out of the shower, I was shivering even more. “John, did you turn the air down?”

“Yeah. I turned it down right when you asked me.”

“Weird, I’m so much colder. I can’t stop shivering.”

“That makes sense. I turned the air down.”

“But it should be getting warmer then.”

“No, colder. The air down means that it will get colder. You know, the temperature will go down.”

“No, the air down means warmer. It won’t blow as much cold air.”

I should have known right then that communication wasn’t going to come easy for John and me. This was only the third day of our honeymoon and we were already having issues.

Fast forward almost exactly five years.

“John, I can’t get this lighter to work.  What’s the trick?”

“Push down on the slide bar and pull back on the trigger.”

“I can’t push down on the slide bar. I can only push up on it.”

“No, you push it down. Here, I’ll show you…”

John proceeded to show me that what he meant by “push down” was exactly what I meant by “push up.” Both of us were referring to moving the slide bar forward using downward force from our thumb.

About two hours later…

“Uh-oh! I started to top of the marshmallow stick on fire!” I called over to John..

“How’d you do that,” he asked.

“I was making a mallow and it fell off and the stick started on fire.”

“So, you started the bottom of the stick on fire, not the top.”

“No, the top. You know, when you stand the stick up to put the mallow on, you’re putting it on the top.”

“Okay, but when you put the marshmallow in the fire to cook it, that end is down, making it the bottom.”

“I can see what you’re saying,” I responded, “but I still say I started the top of the stick on fire.”

“No, it was the bottom,” he answered with a grin.

Sometimes it feels like we’re living in real life version of Who’s on First? We can use the same words, in the same language, and mean totally different things. What I find even more interesting is that when we share these stories with friends, the women often understand what I mean while the men understand what John means. 

At first I really thought John was wrong. I’m sure he thought the same of me. But now we’ve come to realize that we’re both right—we just speak differently.  Luckily, we find these communication lapses pretty funny and have spent a lot of time laughing about them. Somehow, I’m pretty sure that we’ll have plenty more to laugh about over the next 50+ years…

Little Sins

My family and I recently spent the afternoon on the rocky shore of Lake Michigan. George and Patrick played in the water with John while I sat on the beach, enjoying the view. After a bit, I started playing with the pebbles around me as I listened to the giggles floating in from the water.

Picking through the rocks, I found one that stood out.  It was nearly a perfect rectangle with rounded corners, about an inch long and a half inch wide, sandy brown in color. What made this one particularly unique was the cut it had along the middle, nearly the entire way through.

At first I wondered what could have sliced through it like that. Then, as I looked closer, I saw a grain of sand wedged in the cut. I realized that this grain had been pushed back and forth by the water, and, over a long period of time, had sliced through the middle of the rock.

It struck me that this grain of sand is like so many sins in our lives. So often they seem small and insignificant. Maybe it’s just a little lie to our children. Maybe it’s a gossipy story to a friend about a friend. Maybe it’s something that we don’t even think of as a sin, like worry.

But the more we ignore those “insignificant” sins, the more often we do them. And the more often we do them, the more acceptable they become to us. And slowly, over time, those sins cut deeper and deeper into us, causing more and more damage.

That rock, so badly damaged by such a small grain of sand, is on my nightstand now, as a reminder of the harm something “trivial” can cause. I don’t want to let sin eat away at me. I don’t want to get years down the road and wonder, “how did I get here?” I don't want to broken by something that could have easily been stopped.

Lord, I confess to you that I often put sins in categories, and some even end up in the “little” category. I’m sorry that I ever find separation from you trivial. Thank you that you renew your compassions every morning and that you remove our sins as far as the east is from the west. Thank you that you not only remove them, but you heal us. Let me be washed clean and made whole in you. Amen.

Musings on Music

I love music.  It magnifies feelings I have, changes my emotions from sad to happy, and utterly inspires me.  It’s pretty much the coolest thing ever.

To be honest, though, I haven’t put much thought into the type of music I listen to,and what I’m filling my head (and heart) with.  In fact, some of my favorite singers are what I like to call “angry girl singers.” The more angst, the better.

Because music is such a big deal to me, it’s been important that my boys don’t listen to too much “kids only” music. I’ve always wanted them to listen to and appreciate “grown up” music too. Because of that, the very first song we played for the boys was “Better Together” by Jack Johnson. Until recently, Jack Johnson was their favorite musician.

In the past few weeks, however, my heart has been changing a bit on the music front, at least in relation to my kids. While I’m still not a huge fan of kids’ music, I’m also not particularly fond of the idea that I’m pumping angry lyrics into my boys’ heads. Okay, so Sara Bareilles isn’t exactly “angry,” but really, should I have to turn down the volume on a few select songs so the boys don’t hear swear words? Probably not.

Something else encouraged this change in me. I fell in love with Francesca Battistelli’s music, and since it is completely kid friendly, it’s been playing in our car nonstop for a few weeks. Not surprisingly, my little musical boys have picked up on the lyrics. They’ve started to call out “I want Emily!” and when I put on “Emily (It’s Love)” they sing along.

Hearing those two sing “It’s love, it’s love, la la la la, it’s love” has really changed my heart. While I can appreciate secular music, I want my boys’ minds and hearts to be filled with God’s songs. When they’re singing about love, I want it to be God’s love. The Bible teaches that from the wellspring of the heart, the mouth speaks (Matthew 23:34). I want to be sure that George and Patrick’s wellspring is absolutely full of the right things. So, for that reason, I think we’ll be fasting from secular music for a bit.

Adventures in Camping: Life on Planet Mom

Two years ago I joined my church’s MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) program. The theme that year was “Life on Planet Mom.” The idea was that we’ve spent our whole life on “Planet Me” and then, once we became mamas, we moved to “Planet Mom.”

I had two “Life on Planet Mom” moments this past weekend. 

My husband and I celebrated our fifth anniversary on July 1^st.  We decided a few months ago that we were going to go camping in honor of the anniversary and made reservations, as well as plans for our sons, George and Patrick, to attend “Nana-Papa Camp” at my parent’s house.

People asked if it would be hard to leave the boys for three nights. To be honest, though, John and I leave our kids all the time. Okay, that sounds bad. We do, however, value alone time and our families see the importance too, so often they offer to take the kids for us. While the initial goodbye is hard, I’ve never cried over leaving them for a night or two—not even the first time.

Something was different this time though. When I called to check-in, Patrick yelled out “I want to talk to Mommy” and then began to cry. I’m not sure if it was his tone or if it was the tears, but my mommy-heart shattered right then and there. Suddenly, Planet Me and Planet Mom collided and I felt the earthquake on both sides.  One part of me knew this trip was exactly what my marriage needed; the other part of me would have run through fire to get to my boy.

Thank goodness I couldn’t get to him, because I was right: this is what John and I needed. And, as a matter of fact, it is exactly what Patrick needed too. He had a great time with Nana and Papa and even cried when he had to leave their house.

My second “Planet Mom” moment came in the middle of the night. For those of you who are familiar with tent camping, you’ll understand what I mean when I say the walls of a tent aren’t thick. You can hear everything and everyone around you (which is why we choose wooded campsites, but more on that in a later post).

At around 4am, I woke to the sound of a baby crying.  Without thinking, I started getting up to help. In my mind, I’m a mommy, so when I baby cries, I go.  As my head cleared, however, I realized that the crying child wasn’t mine and that his mother probably wouldn’t be impressed by a stranger coming to help.  After this realization, I fell right back to sleep.  About an hour later, when the baby cried again, I just reminded myself “that’s not mine” and drifted peacefully back to sleep…for five more hours. As much as I like being a mom, it was great to not deal with the crying for once!

This weekend was another reminder that my life is completely changed now that I’m a mama. Trips are no longer easy. Not only do I have to pack my belongings, I have to pack my heart up too…it’s not going with me, it’s going with my boys. And sounds aren’t the same now either. What once would have annoyed me (seriously, who lets their kids cry in a public place in the middle of the night), now sets my body in motion (oh dear! That baby is crying. I need to help!). So long Planet Me. I’m fully living on Planet Mom now.

5 Years

I noticed him standing with a group of people, talking and laughing. Frankly, he was hard not to notice.  At 6’9”, he stood out, to say the least.  But there was something more than just his height; he seemed so confident, so “together.”

As the week went on, we had very little time together, yet when we did find ourselves in the same group, it felt like we were alone.  We had short, but meaningful, conversations in the car, at a restaurant, on the airplane. I can talk to anyone but something was just different about him.

My mom claims she heard it in my voice.  She says I said his name different than everyone else’s.  I’m not so sure I did, but maybe.  He was definitely special.

We spent the next week on the phone.  Yes, I do mean we spent the week on the phone.  Every night, after class, we’d talk.  Favorite books, sports, names of future children.  We talked about it all. I couldn’t help but wonder, where is this going? My cell phone company knew where it was going: right into overages for the month.

That weekend he came to visit with a group of friends. I didn’t know what to expect, so I prayed for a sign. Father, please, just give me a sign.  If he’s the one I’m supposed to date, let me know.

Two days later, in Chicago, four of us stopped to talk to a homeless man.  He told us a poem that he made up on the spot.  First, he looked at me and did a rhyme about my beauty and smile. Then, he looked at John, and spoke of his kindness and strength. Then, he stopped and said you’re perfect together. I’m not sure what happened next; I’d stopped thinking or listening for a moment, just letting those words you’re perfect together sink in.

It was in that exact spot, 967 days later, John asked me to be his wife. Of course, I said yes.

For the next eight months we worked hard to finish up college and plan our wedding. We dreamed of what life would be like when we were husband and wife.

It’s been five years since July 1, 2006, the day I said I do to John Michael Gleich. We’ve had some fantastic highs and some nearly shattering lows. Our dreams of the idealistic marriage certainly haven’t come true…how could they with two bull-headed people?  But it’s been a great five years. For every minute spent crying, we’ve spent two laughing. For every minute spent in a silly argument, we’ve spent two making up. Every day, we get to live life together.  Really, what more could I ask for?

I love you, John. Thanks for choosing me every day for the past five years. Know that I’ve chosen you, too, and I promise to choose you every day for the next hundred. Happy anniversary.

Toddler Footprints

Today Thriving Family posted the question "What do you like most about summer?" on Twitter and Facebook. Throughout the day, I thought about that question. I like the hot weather (even though we don't have air conditioning). I like having a looser schedule. I like that my husband has a break from school. I like being outside. I like the sunshine.

But what do I like most?

As the boys and I came in from playing in the baby pool in our yard, I looked down, and I saw what I like best about summer. Toddler footprints. George and Patrick were leaving little, wet toddler footprints all over the laundry room.

Those sweet little footprints reminded me of so much. They reminded me of the fun times had in the pool. They reminded me of summers gone by (last year they would have been smeared from all the tumbling the boys were doing). They reminded me that soon, those footprints would be much bigger.

Time goes so fast and I find myself often too busy to appreciate the small things in life. So this summer, what I'm going to like best are those little toddler footprints.

A Country Father's Day

I love living near Chicago, but at heart, I’m a country girl. I grew up on a gravel road, surrounded by farms, 5 miles out of town. In honor of Father’s Day, here’s a list of things I learned from my dad that only a country girl would know:

1.) How to spot and identify birds of prey.

2.) What a deer tick looks like.

3.) How to shine deer.

4.) How to shoot all sorts of guns.

5.) When choosing your clothing, always ask yourself, “Would I be comfortable in a deer blind?”

6.) How to make a fire using flint.

7.) Blaze orange looks good on everyone.

8.) Duct tape and Shoe Goo fix everything.

9.) How to use a homemade turkey call.

10.) How to make the best apple crisp over an open fire.

Thanks, Dad, for teaching me all sorts of valuable things. I love the memories we have together and that I have awesome tidbits to pass on to the boys.

Happy Father’s Day!

Why be good?

I've been thinking a lot lately about why I want my kids to be good. Well, more like, I've been thinking a lot lately that I want my kids to be good. Then I started to wonder why. Really, honestly, searching my heart and asking myself why I wanted my kids to be good. Here are my answers:

1.) I want life to be easy. When my children do what I ask, when I ask, I don't have to think or do anything. Life is easy.

2.) I don't want to be embarrassed. When my kids act up, I look bad. Let me be clear: I am not embarrassed by my children. I'm embarrassed that I can't handle them. It has very little to do with them and a lot to do with me.

There you have it. I've come up with two, completely self-serving reasons I want my kids to be good. I don't want to work hard and I don't want to look bad while I'm not working hard. Hmmm. This doesn't sound so good. Safety doesn't even make the list. I mean sure, I want my kids to be safe, but if they just listen, life will be easy, and they'll be safe. Right?

Could I be more selfish?

Okay, so my motives are bad. Does that mean that I'm wrong to want good kids?

After praying about it and thinking on it a while, I'm going to say, "I don't know, but I have a hunch."

No, wanting good kids isn't wrong. I want them to love each other (especially in a sibling situation). I want them to laugh, giggle, and be joyful. I want them to rest when its time to rest, both in body and soul. I want them to be patient with each other (and with me when I say things like, "I'll get you milk in a minute"). I want them to be kind to others on the playground. I want them to be good, loyal friends. I want them to use gentle hands and words with each other. Maybe, above all, I want the to use self-control when they're speaking, as well as in other areas.

When the list is written like that, it sounds a lot like Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control...

When my motives are right, then the reason I want good kids is because I want them to be like Jesus.

When my motives are right, it becomes less about me and my needs, and more about my boys and their need...their need for God.

Father, change my motives. Let my first priority be to have boys who are full of your spirit. Give me the strength to discipline when it's needed, even when I don't feel like it. Remind me that this is not about me, Lord, but completely and totally about you. Above all, Father, let my babies be wild with love for you.

Mondays with the Ladies

I hate Mondays with every ounce of my being. Okay, that's a bit of and exaggeration, but I really don't like Mondays. Yes, I stay home with my kids. Yes, Monday is really no different than any other week day. However, there is just something about Mondays. It's the first day of the week that my husband isn't home. We're in recovery mode from our weekend. We're tired and whiney (yes, all of us). Mondays are just hard.

The one thing that makes Mondays bearable, though, is Monday nights. On Monday nights, I get to go to small group. Just over a year ago, a dear friend invited me to an all women's small group and my supportive and loving husband encouraged me to go. Praise the Lord, because it has been the best thing for me.

We just finished Friendships of Women Bible Study by Dee Brestin, and while it wasn't my favorite study, so many good things came from it. The very last question of the book was, "List three things that you think you will always remember from this study. Why? What will you do with them?"

Here are my three things:

1.) (though this doesn't exactly answer the question) I got my hands in the Bible. Mrs. Brestin wrote her study in a way that had us flipping from the front of the Bible to the back and then back again. It was awesome to see connections in the Old and New Testament. I will not forget my first Bible study that got me into the nitty-gritty of the Bible.

2.) There is this great quote on page 129 of this book: "Boundaries release folly from fools and fragrance from roses." Wow. What wisdom. I looked at this line two ways. First, if I'm friends with someone who has issues with my family's boundaries, that isn't okay. Second, it made me look at myself. When I have issues with someone's boundaries, I'm a fool. I want boundaries to bring out my Christ-like fragrance not my foolishness.

3.) We need truth-tellers in our lives. I've always had a hard time with constructive criticism and for that reason have often shied away from confrontation. I've felt like if I confront someone, they may have something to confront me about and I just don't want to hear it. What an immature attitude. God has used this study to deal with me in this area and has shown me how important it is to have people in our lives who will tell the truth, even when it hurts. When I want candy coating, I'll call my mama (that's what I need her for). When I want hard truth, I know who to call, and I love those people for that.

So, Mrs. Brestin, though I started this study unsure, and still say it was a bit confusing at times, thank you. This is just what this girl needed.

The (new) Adventure Begins...

In awkward, shakey handwriting, I wrote, "When I grow up, I'm going to be an author." That was in first grade. In second grade, I wrote my first fictional story about a dinosaur and her baby. I used flashbacks and no one got it except my mom who said it was great (thanks, Mom!). In middle school, high school, and college, my love of writing developed and grew.

Now, after spending the last two and a half years being a mama and letting my passion for writing sit aside while my new passion for my kiddos took over, I stand here, breathe held and eyes squeezed shut on the edge of my dream, ready to leap.

I.Am.A.Writer.

There. I said it, so now it's true. I am a writer.

Hi. I'm Kate Gleich. I'm a stay-at-home mom and I'm a writer.

...continued

My grandparents used to live in East Troy, WI, across the street from Lake Beulah. Some of my favorite memories include being at their house, sitting on the porch on summer evenings basking in the smell of the lake and the sweet smell of flowers. Since a very young age, that smell signifies summer for me. Tonight was the first night of summer in my world. Lake Michigan is a mile from our house and the Magnolia flowers are open...it's perfect.

Not only was tonight my first night of summer, but it was the first time in a year and a half that I've run. And it felt great! The first step of Couch to 5k is to do a 5 minute brisk walk warm-up, and then to alternate between 60 seconds of running and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes of running/walking. Then a cool down walk. I was out for 35 minutes and walked/ran 2.9 miles.

Now, of that 2.9 miles, the majority was walking, but still, that's pretty good. Plus, that was my second workout of the day! Hopefully I can keep it up.

Adventures in Getting in Shape

Ugh. I used to like working out. Well, at least I didn't hate it. Mostly because it wasn't that hard. I could go on my elliptical for a half hour, watch TV, work up a great sweat, and be done. Now, it's hard. I keep reminding myself that my body has been through it's own sort of war and that my stomach has been stretched like a balloon, but it's still frustrating. So, I didn't do it.

But, here's the deal. In about 6 weeks I'm going on vacation and I'm still about 15lbs too fat for my summer clothes. Oh, and we just bought a van, so we have no money for new "fat" summer clothes. Either I'll be naked on vacation or I'll lose my weight. And really, who wants to see a naked momma with her deflated balloon belly?

Here's the plan. First, I'm going to start the Couch to 5k program. I love running and it's the easiest way for me to shed the lbs. The main issues with running, though, are time and weather. So, the days that I can't run, I'll be doing the BabyTalk workout.

The beautiful thing about running is that it will be "me time." Time that I can spend clearing my mind and feeling free. And if/when the boys go with me, it'll be great to get them outside.

The beautiful thing about the BabyTalk is that I can spend time with my boys. And, as an added bonus, we're working on sitting up, so it gives them time to practice.

Today, Patrick was napping while George and I did the BabyTalk workout. For about a half hour, George worked on his tummy muscles while I worked on mine, and I'm pretty sure that by the end, we had both worked up a pretty good sweat.

So, today was the first day of my 6 weeks to Skinny (well, at least not fat). Let's see if I can hit my goal of 15lbs off in 6 weeks!